Team Vampire Queen
by Interspark
Summary: On a trip to a gloomy tavern, Marceline the Vampire Queen is approached by a mysterious, one-armed girl, who invites her on a daring raid on the undead inhabitants of the Graveyard Kingdom.
1. Chapter 1

Team Vampire Queen

The sun had just set over a gloomy tavern in one of Ooo's more sketchy areas. It was right next to a dense, dark forest, which was infamous for muggings, maimings and pointlessly spiteful hexings. The perpetrators of those crimes could often be found in the pub, if they weren't out committing more of them. There was no law in this region of Ooo. It was purely survival of the fittest.

The bar was crowded with all manner of demons, goblins, trolls and other ne'er-do-wells. They talked amongst themselves in hushed, but threatening tones. Everyone there was armed to the teeth and prepared to spill blood in the likely event of a fight breaking out. Any day that went by without someone getting violently murdered was a welcome surprise for the sultry, blue-skinned barkeep. It wasn't the kind of place where one would expect to see Candy People.

A good rule of thumb if you planned to survive in a place like this was to enter quietly, wear dark colours, and draw as little attention to yourself as possible. And because everyone behaved that way, if you _were _suicidal enough to draw attention to yourself, it was _impossibly_ easy, and a moment later, that was demonstrated.

The pub's door was kicked open so hard it almost flew off its hinges and in floated a girl. She wore black jeans and a leather, biker's jacket. Her hair was jet black and tied into a huge, bushy ponytail and her skin was grey-blue. On her shoulder, she rested a bright red battle-axe. Around half of the patrons had heard horrible tales of Marceline, the dreaded Vampire Queen, and instinctively inched away from the door. Even those who didn't know who she was were stunned into silence by her unsettlingly relaxed attitude and menacing aura.

Marceline floated slowly towards the bar, loving the terror she could feel emanating from the monstrous patrons. As she reached the centre of the pub, she paused, snapped her head round and bore her fangs. A small party of goblins screamed and fell off their chairs. Laughing loudly, Marceline continued to the bar. She spun her axe around and slammed it down on the counter.

"Cranberry juice." She snapped at the bartender.

The bartender immediately got to work on Marceline's drink. He didn't show any fear whatsoever. In his line of work, if you were even partially prone to fear, your heart would explode after a few days.

As Marceline floated, absent-mindedly over one of the bar stools, inspecting her fingernails, the bar shook slightly as a hulking figure stomped towards her. She glanced over her shoulder to see an enormous man, with stony, grey skin and what appeared to be a threatening horn jutting out of his forehead.

"I don't know who you think you are, lady…" He snarled. "But I don't take kindly to folk bustin' in on my turf and floatin' around like they own the place! You're dealing with…"

Suddenly, Marceline yawned loudly, and quite on purpose.

Livid, the man continued. "Do you know who you're…"

Marceline continued to sarcastically yawn, almost shouting over him with her hand casually covering her mouth.

Furiously, the man lurched towards her, with his fist in the air. Marceline moved like a blur, first driving a knee into the grey man's stomach, and then while he was still winded, seizing his horn and slamming it down on the bar counter, leaving him to stare at the floor while he struggled futilely to escape.

"Your drink, Miss Vampire." The bartender said quietly, holding out a glass of cranberry juice, completely unphased by the spectacle before him.

"Thanks man." Marceline said, taking the glass.

She calmly sipped the red from the liquid while effortlessly keeping her assailant staring pitifully at the rotting, wooden floorboards. After almost five minutes, Marceline gave a refreshed sigh and set down her glass of milky white cranberry juice. Then, as casually as if she was chopping carrots for dinner, she picked up her axe and swiftly rid the grey man of his horn.

The man stood up and gave a high-pitched scream, waving trembling hands over where his horn used to be. With a malicious grin, Marceline hurled the horn out of the door she had left open.

"Fetch!" She laughed.

Now crying loudly, the huge man sprinted from the bar, leaving the other patrons to stare in petrified awe. The bartender had begun wiping down the bar top and wasn't even looking at Marceline anymore. All in all, it had been a pretty quiet day for him.

Marceline was about to turn back to the bar, when she thought she spotted a familiar face sitting at the back of the pub. She gingerly floated forwards, trying to get a batter look. Was that? It couldn't be…

"Gunter!?" Marceline asked, pushing past several patrons on her way over to the little penguin. "What are you doing here… and WHY are you wearing that?"

Gunter was sitting opposite a small table from a strange, humanoid, duck-like creature with whom he seemed to be playing poker. On Gunter's head, was Simon's magic crown. Marceline was tempted to snatch the crown from the penguin's head, but it didn't seem to have any of the physical or mental effects it had had on Simon. Maybe it didn't work on penguins? Then again, maybe it was because the crown already recognised a master.

"Waaaa!" Gunter quacked, in answer to Marceline's question.

"Oh cool. But… Simon just let you take it?" She asked, sceptically.

"Waa waaa…"

"How did you pull that off?" Marceline was even more confused.

"Waaa waaaaa waa!"

"Oh… I guess that makes sense." She admitted. "So who's your friend?" Marceline floated over the table and sat between them, with her back to the pub's wall.

"Choose Goose Senior is my name!" The goose loudly introduced himself, in a grating voice. "A travelling merchant, I disclaim!"

The large bird's neck and arms waved around as if boneless, and his wide, unblinking eyes pointed in completely opposite directions. The combined result sent shivers up Marceline's spine. He had bright, yellow feathers and wore a frilly, blue shirt and a feathered beret.

"Senior? So… you got a kid?" Marceline asked, scanning the pub for another creepy goose creature. It seemed weird to identify oneself as 'senior' except to distinguish from one's child with the same name.

"Though a son I'm yet to sire, preparation, life requires!"

"You call yourself senior… because you _might_ have a son some day?" Marceline asked, raising an eyebrow.

Choose Goose Sr nodded enthusiastically, evidently incapable of coming up with a couplet that simply meant 'yes'. Gunter quacked loudly, drawing CG's attention back to their poker game. They both held a hand of cards, and various coins littered the table, mostly piled next to each of them. Choose Goose pushed his pile of coins into the middle of the table.

"I'm all in, cause I know I'll win!"

Gunter quacked casually, and shrugged off Simon's crown, betting it against CG's pile of coins. The two birds put their cards down at the same time. Choose Goose had a straight flush, which was beaten by Gunter's royal flush. Gunter quacked triumphantly, hopped onto the table and began rolling around in his newfound riches.

"A royal flush!? You rotten cheat! I'm a goose that won't be beat!" Choose Goose cried, banging his fist down on the table.

"Nice poker face dude." Marceline remarked, genuinely impressed by the penguin's capabilities.

Before the outraged goose could demand that Gunter deal him a new hand of cards, a figure silently approached the table, and sat down at an empty chair. Marceline, Gunter and Choose Goose looked up at the new arrival. Clearly, none of them knew or were expecting her.

It was a girl. Anyone who didn't know Marceline very well would guess that the girl was around her age. She had strikingly similar, flowing, black hair, mint green skin and yellow, cat-like eyes. She wore a dark green tunic with a dagger strapped across the front and a sword holstered to the belt. The first thing any of them noticed though, was that the girl was missing her right arm.

"I saw your display back there." She said to Marceline. Her voice was deep and monotone. "You handle yourself pretty well."

"Uhh… thanks…" Marceline said, hesitantly, dubious of what the girl's point might be. She had already chopped a guy's horn off, she wasn't interested in picking another fight. Thankfully, she got straight to the point.

"I got some work coming up, too hardcore for me alone, so I'm looking for some guys who don't mind getting their claws dirty for some primo cash."

"You found anyone _with_ claws?" Marceline asked. A great many of the pub goers had claws or talons, but none of them showed any sign of being aligned with the girl.

"It's a figure of speech…" She said quietly.

"WAAAA!" Gunter suddenly cried.

The girl looked at him quizzically, until Marceline translated. "He says he's in."

"If there's money to be had, to count me out you must me mad!" Choose Goose exclaimed.

The girl looked between the two psychotic birds, surprisingly unphased. She pointed at Marceline. "Invite was just for her. Sorry."

"Sure. Sounds like a blast." Marceline shrugged. It wasn't like she had anything better to be doing.

"WAAA! WAAA!" Gunter quacked angrily.

He put Simon's crown back on and suddenly, the strange girl's head was encased in a block of ice. The weight caused her head to fall hard, onto the table. Cool as a cucumber, the girl drew her dagger and stabbed the block of ice, showing impeccable control in shattering it, without so much as scratching her head.

"Ok… You can come." She conceded, sitting up again.

"Waaaaa!" The little penguin quacked, gratefully.

"So what's the gig?" Marceline asked.

"It's a siege on the castle in the heart of the Graveyard Kingdom. In their vaults, they got a crystal that'll wipe a person's mind clean."

"Waaa?" Gunter cooed.

Although the girl didn't understand Gunter, his tone made it clear he had asked a question, and the girl knew what information she had left out.

"Usually, I'd just sneak in and take what I want, but I've cased the joint and their security is wicked tight. That's why I need you guys. This isn't about stealth, it's about muscle."

"Sounds like quite a risky raid!" Choose Goose interjected. "How much do we expect to get paid?"

"My employer's offering 10,000 little emeralds for the crystal. We all get back alive, that's 2,000 each."

"Not by my math, girl." Marceline growled. She had never paid for anything in her life, and was purely tagging along for kicks. But as a matter of pride, she wasn't letting the girl have any of her cut.

"There's a fifth waiting outside. We _all_ get 2,000." The girl's resentment at Marceline's implication was the first emotion she'd shown since she sat down. "So, you guys are all in?"

"Sure, let's do this!" Marceline grinned. She extended her left hand for the girl to shake. "I'm Marceline, the Vampire Queen."

"Choose Goose! Introduce!"

"Waaa!"

"Pleased to meet you all. I'm Shoko."

* * *

**Why has writing for Choose Goose taken me this much time!? It's so much fun to write in rhymes! :D**


	2. Chapter 2

The one-armed girl, penguin, goose and vampire, casually left the pub. As soon as they had got up to leave, Gunter had abandoned his winnings, and ran excitedly towards the door, leaving Choose Goose Senior to shiftily scoop them into his enormous backpack, which was at least three times his size.

"So where's this…?" Marceline began to ask Shoko, but then she was interrupted by an all too familiar voice.

"One-armed miscreant! You kept me WAITING!" The Earl of Lemongrab merged the last syllable of his sentence with a high-pitched shriek, which, as anyone with ears would agree, he did far too often. "This is UNACCEPTABLE!"

"Dude, mellow…" Shoko said, proving to Marceline that she hadn't known him very long. "I found the rest of our…"

"Step mommy!?" Lemongrab interrupted, staring at Marceline in disbelief.

"Oh geez…" Marceline groaned.

"You two know each other?"

"STEP MOMMY!" Lemongrab shrieked.

He charged at Marceline and half hugged-half tackled her.

"Get… off me you creep!" Marceline snarled, pushing Lemongrab off her as delicately as possible. Bonnibel had made her swear never to harm the annoying lemon when she found out how much he irritated Marceline. "I'm not your step mom and Bonnie's not my wife!"

"MOMMY MARCELINE!" Lemongrab screamed, still frantically pawing his hands at her. "MOTHER HAS FORSAKEN ME! PLEASE TALK TO HER! SHE WILL LISTEN TO YOOOUUUUUU!"

"And tell her what!?" Marceline snapped. "You need to realise, Lemon Head, that you don't know what it is you want! Bonnie gave you your own castle, a lifetime's supply of food and she visits you twice a month! And what do you do? Smash your walls with sledgehammers, refuse to eat because you think she's trying to poison you, and serve her lemon juice squeezed from your own head!"

"My juice is 100% ORGANIC!" Lemongrab complained. He placed his hands on the sides of his head and pointed the lump atop it at Marceline. "TRY IT!"

Marceline raised her axe. "You start squeezing and I'll turn you into lemon drizzle cake!" She roared.

Lemongrab shuffled away from her, crouched down and started whimpering. Gunter waddled over to him and patted him reassuringly with his flipper.

"I'd heard rumours making fun, of your loony lemon chum." Choose Goose whispered to Marceline. Clearly tact was something hard to work into compulsory rhyming.

"Uhh, can we go now?" Shoko asked, irritably.

"Definitely." Marceline quickly replied. "But you can keep the lemon company. Come on baby." She rested her fingertips on the ground, and Gunter promptly abandoned Lemongrab and climbed up to Marceline's shoulder. "Gunts and I will scout ahead. We'll see you at the Graveyard Kingdom."

And with that, Marceline flew into the air, leaving Shoko and Choose Goose to pull Lemongrab together.

* * *

The region of Ooo the pub had been in shared a border with the Graveyard Kingdom, so it had only taken a couple of minutes for Marceline and Gunter to reach it. Marceline had briefly inspected the kingdom's castle from a distance, only to realise that Shoko had been right, every possible entrance to the fortress was flawlessly guarded by all manner of zombie, skeleton and ghoul. Clearly, the only way in was a full, frontal assault.

Resigned to waiting for the others, Marceline floated on her back, high above the border of the kingdom, with Gunter sitting on her belly. When Marceline had first met Gunter, she had considered hating him, seeing as he was basically Marceline's replacement as the madman's pet. But that wasn't exactly something she wanted to be, and it wasn't the little penguin's fault, anyway. Besides, he was a pretty cool guy.

"So how's Simon doing these days?" Marceline asked casually, not sure if it was a healthy question for her to be asking.

"Waaa!" Gunter answered.

"Oh… Well that's cool. I hope he's not getting in the way of Bonnie's research." Marceline replied sadly, wishing she hadn't asked.

The two floated in silence for a few more minutes. It was always nighttime in the Graveyard Kingdom, but even so, Marceline didn't particularly like it there. Sunlight, she could deal with, but the kingdom's undead inhabitants could be _such_ a buzz kill.

Eventually, Gunter stood up straight and looked around attentively, like a meerkat. Just as Marceline was about to ask what had caught his attention, he surprised her by jumping off her. She was about to shoot down and catch him, when she realised he was flying along, by gently flapping his flippers. Finding it hard not to smirk, Marceline followed Gunter as he gracelessly descended, bobbing up and down like a balloon running out of air. He led her across the outskirts of the Graveyard Kingdom and to a small hill, overlooking the castle, behind which, Shoko, Choose Goose and Lemongrab were crouched.

"Step mommy! We arrived here before…" Lemongrab began, but, sensing another tantrum coming, Shoko wrapped her arm around his mouth, effectively silencing him.

"You checked out the castle?" She guessed, quietly.

"Yeah, it's pretty tight." Marceline agreed. "You got any plan that's more specific than just muscling our way in?" Although she wasn't opposed to the idea, she knew that Lemongrab was less than average when it came to swordplay, and while walking him to his death wouldn't exactly be a breach of her promise to Bonnie, she doubted she'd be pleased if she found out. Plus, she could tell at a glance that Choose Goose had zero combat expertise.

"Hmmm…" Shoko pondered to herself. "Well I had only planned on there being three of us, but since we're all here, I guess a couple of us _could_ sneak in while the rest of us are on distraction duty."

Immediately, Gunter waddled over to Marceline and hugged her leg with his flippers.

"I guess Gunter and I are on the attack team." Marceline giggled.

"I would also like to…" Lemongrab began.

"You're in the sneaking in group." Marceline immediately interrupted.

Lemongrab whimpered sadly, but didn't complain.

"I have many handy toys, for treasure-raiding girls and boys." Choose Goose said, shifting his backpack as he spoke.

The other four looked at Shoko expectantly. Her yellow eyes darted back and forth, clearly torn, until she said, "I always wanted to see the famous Vampire Queen in action."

"Alright then, let's kick some undead butt!"

* * *

The front of the Graveyard Kingdom castle was patrolled by dozens of undead soldiers, marching back and forth, diligently looking out for attackers, but standing on either side of the drawbridge, were two lightly armoured skeletons who had been on guard for longer than anyone alive could remember.

"Hey Phil." One of them said. "What do you want to do when our shift is over?"

Phil sighed. "Lenny, dude, you ask me that, like, every five years! We don't even know what people are gonna be doing for fun when our shift ends!"

Lenny paused for a moment. "Do we know what people do for fun now?"

"Uhhh, I think I overheard a visitor talking about pineapples once. Something to do with those maybe?"

"What are pineapples for, anyway?" Lenny asked, clearly never having thought to ask before.

"Well they're hard and kinda spiky. So my guess is a weapon. I could see one of them being used to kill a guy."

Lenny sighed. "You know Phil, it's comments like that that cause the stereotypes about us undead guards to spread. You know what I wanna do when we get some time to myself? Get back to my cross-stitching. I started this really cute one of a puppy a few centuries ago, never got to finish it, it's driving me crazy…"

The two guards stood in silence for a few more minutes, watching the same old scene they'd been watching for so many years, of zombies and skeletons marching silently back and forth. Slowly, the two noticed their joints seem to stiffen with cold, and dark clouds began to creep across the sky towards the castle.

"Huh… You think we're in for some snow?" Lenny asked.

Before Phil could reply, a gleaming javelin of ice descended from the sky and cleaved through his shoulder, neatly severing his left arm. Then, a smaller one pierced his skull, shattering it like plaster. Lenny couldn't even react to his friend's demise, before he himself was obliterated by a much larger falling icicle The undead legions raced around in a panic, holding their shields above their heads and desperately looking around for the source of the deadly hailstorm.

Gunter floated towards the castle dramatically. The crown on his head shone in the light of the electric-blue lightning crackling in the dark clouds above him. As a small platoon of zombies recognised Gunter as the wizard responsible for the attack, they drew spears and bows, ready to retaliate. But no sooner had they done that, than a dark shadow flew into their midst and, a flash of red later, the entire group had been cut in half at the waist by Marceline's axe.

Shoko's battle style wasn't so flashy. With her single arm and sword, she parried her assailant's attacks, disorientated with kicks and, when she got the chance, struck with stunningly precise slashes.

The hordes of undead emerged from the castle and burst from the ground without end. For each one of them the trio slew, two more seemed to take their place. Despite this, none of them seemed to be having any trouble and actually looked like they were enjoying themselves. Gunter quacked happily as he was enveloped by a web of slushy, ice tentacles, which slithered across the ground, devouring the soldiers as it went. Marceline morphed into a giant, hairy bat with tattered wings and began crushing the advancing undead with her bare hands. Not to be outdone, Shoko sheathed her sword and produced several tiny grenades, which had been attached to her belt by the pins for her one-armed convenience. She threw them, and each one exploded, creating a tiny black hole, which consumed the undead soldiers ravenously.

Edging towards one another as the soldiers got more and more numerous, Shoko called over the pandemonium, "How do you think the others are doing?"

"Well if I know Lemongrab..." Marceline called back, wishing she didn't. "He's probably beating that goose up right about now, for no reason."

* * *

The inside of the castle was bare, as every soldier than could be spared was dealing with the relentless battle that was ensuing on the surface. On one of the otherwise empty corridors, Lemongrab had furiously pinned Choose Goose to the ground, baring his razor-sharp teeth, threateningly.

"Alright, crazy lemon! I concede!" Choose Goose begged. "You're in charge here, we're agreed!"


	3. Chapter 3

**Apparently, I could have been clearer regarding what era this is in. It's in Shoko's time, shortly before the events Finn remembers in The Vault. I'm guessing Lemongrab is one of the older characters in the show. As for Choose Goose, that's one of his ancestors, hence the "Senior" remark in Chapter One. I admit it, I'm stretching what's probable to get these five together.**

* * *

Lemongrab and Choose Goose hesitantly stepped down the castle's quiet corridors, their footsteps echoing uncomfortably loudly. They had been walking around for half an hour now, and had no indication that they were getting any closer to the vault. Occasionally, they had run into lone guards, who Lemongrab had clumsily defeated by waving his sword at them and screaming. Fortunately, the more competent undead were busy fighting Marceline and the others.

"This castle has me in a daze! These corridors are quite the maze!" Choose Goose loudly complained.

"Your rhyming is irritating!" Lemongrab began, threatening to start screaming with every syllable. Sure enough, he continued. "Geese are supposed to be delicious, NOT ARTICULATE!"

Lemongrab's shrill voice echoed through the castle, and seconds later, a rotting, green zombie, wielding a sword came running down the corridor towards them.

"Stop! Intruders!" He wheezed as he ran.

Furiously, Lemongrab drew his sword and charged forwards, flailing both arms as he did. The zombie screamed weakly and raised his sword in defence. The two blades collided, and the zombie's rotting muscles failed him immediately. His sword was sent clattering to the stone floor, and a second flash of Lemongrab's blade neatly decapitated him. His head rolled along the floor and came to a stop, looking up at Choose Goose and Lemongrab.

"Huh… Well that's just great, isn't it?" The head complained. "You know I'm never gonna hear the end of this from my dad… '_This would never have happened to your brother!_' Grod…"

Lemongrab picked up the head. "Agent of evil! You will relinquish your secrets!" He shrieked. "Where are this diabolical stronghold's treasures!? TELL ME IMMEDIATELY!"

The zombie head scowled at him. "Or what? You'll cut off my body!? Ohhh wait, you already did that…"

Lemongrab gritted his teeth and growled. "TELL ME OR YOU WILL BE SORRY!"

The head winced as the pitch of Lemongrab's voice skyrocketed. "Oh… Glob… I can't cover my ears! Ok fine! I'll tell you! Just stop yelling! Just go the way you were heading, take the second left, down the stairs, third corridor from the right, down the trapdoor, then two lefts, second right, up the stairs and it's the sixth door on the left. You can't miss it."

"THANK YOU!" Lemongrab screamed.

He dropped the head carelessly, and he began walking down the corridor, Choose Goose paused and hesitantly glanced at the head.

"Wait!" Called the head. "Can I come with you guys? I'm probably fired now anyway…"

Before Lemongrab could reply, Choose Goose picked up the head and studied it carefully.

"That might not be bad advice… Zombie heads can fetch a hefty price!" He smiled.

"Awesome! Wait, what did you say?" The head asked.

Without replying, Choose Goose used his overly flexible arms to open his backpack and drop the head into it.

"Are you done SOCIALISING!?" Lemongrab demanded, angrily.

Choose Goose sighed and walked past Lemongrab, in the direction of the vault.

"Yeah, check me out, breaking all the rules!" Came the head's muffled voice. "Helping out the good guys! What a switcheroo, right? Oh, I'm Keith, by the way. Ohh, gross! There's like four other heads in here! Well… guess I can't be _too_ judgemental, right…? Right…? Oh… wait… they're all dead."

Lemongrab and Choose Goose proceeded, following Keith's directions, but ignoring the jabbering head, although Lemongrab ground his teeth angrily.

"You know… since I'm the only _live_ head in here… you might even say… hehe… that I'm the _HEAD_ head! Right? You see what I did there?"

Lemongrab spun around furiously, causing Choose Goose to stop in his tracks.

"ENOUGH! You will be silent, agent of evil!" He screamed.

"Make me!" Keith spat, through Choose Goose's bag.

Lemongrab stormed around Choose Goose and punched his bag.

"Ha! You missed!"

Lemongrab punched the bag again.

"Ow! Ok, I'll be quiet…"

As they proceeded towards the vault, neither Lemongrab nor Choose Goose needed any reminder of Keith's directions. As they turned the second to last corner, Keith nervously spoke up again.

"You know… I may have neglected to mention… Don't hit me! This is important! There's a kind of… thingy… that guards the vault. Scares the willies out of me. I mean, you guys don't have ears, so you'll probably be fine. But then again, you _can _hear one another so… Well the very best of luck, either way!"

Choose Goose promptly pulled on Lemongrab's arm, forcing him to stop. "I don't want to wind up dead! We should listen to the head!"

Lemongrab drew his sword and rounded on the goose. "You agree with him!? You're as good as ONE OF THEM!"

"Swallow your pride! I'm on your side!" Choose Goose snapped.

"Hmm…" Lemongrab glared at Choose Goose threateningly. His expression said, 'I'm watching you'.

Hesitantly, Choose Goose followed the frustrated lemon as he stormed down the corridor, counting the doors they walked past. As they reached the sixth door on the left, Lemongrab hesitated. It was a thick, wooden door with heavy, iron hinges, there was no telling what was on the other side.

"Hey, are we there?" Keith said. "Well this has been a blast, you can drop me off right here. I'll see about finding my union representative and getting my severance package sorted. I'll stay in touch, yeah?"

Ignoring Keith, Lemongrab shrieked a battle cry and kicked the heavy door clean off its hinges. On the other side, was a narrow, stony corridor, with another door at the end, sitting right in front of which, was a pale grey zombie, staring glumly at his feet.

Without hesitation, Lemongrab drew his sword, screamed, "EN GUARD, HELL SPAWN!" and charged forward, flailing his sword in the air.

The zombie looked up casually, and the next second, the air in the corridor erupted in a spine-chilling shriek. The din lasted for just a few seconds, and when it faded, it slowly became apparent that Lemongrab had frozen, not in ice, but was simply stuck in a running pose that would be impossible to keep balanced in, under normal circumstances.

Realising what had happened, Choose Goose cried. "Hang in there, my lemon friend! I'll give this tale a happy end!"

He charged towards the zombie, flailing his seemingly boneless arms, and, another unearthly wail later, he shared Lemongrab's fate. The two of them stood like statues, in a charging attack pose, and partially floating in the air.

"Wow… I feel kind of smug, you know?" Keith said. "I mean, I know I didn't _technically_ tell you not to come in here… But… had you asked, I probably would have been against it. And this right here is the kind of thing I'd have been afraid of…"

Completely incapacitated, the two of them could do little more than wait for a miracle. And fortunately, at that very moment, two of them were darting down the corridors, in response to their screams.

During the battle on the surface, Marceline and Shoko had agreed that they had stunningly little confidence in Lemongrab and Choose Goose, and had decided that one of them should go to back them up, but it turned out that Marceline didn't trust Shoko to look after Lemongrab, and Shoko didn't trust anyone not to run off with her crystal. So the new plan had become for Gunter to single-handidly preoccupy the undead forces of evil while the girls infiltrated the castle, but then they were faced with the problem that Gunter would follow Marceline every time she tried to enter the castle. Fresh out of options, the three of them had blitzed through the army, into the castle halls and had desperately tried to outrun them, with moderate success.

As they were backing down a hallway, fending off two wyverns and a pack of undead wolves, the three of them had heard an ear-splitting shriek

"I'll hold these guys off, go make sure those dweebs are ok!" Shoko had ordered.

Grateful for Shoko's display of teamwork, Marceline and Gunter flew through the stone halls as fast as they could. As they approached the sound of the noise, they heard a second scream. Marceline and Gunter entered an empty doorway, to see Choose Goose and Lemongrab frozen in place, and a pale zombie overseeing them.

"Take this, you undead butt!" Marceline snarled.

She flew forwards and threw her axe like a frisbee. As she did, Gunter quacked angrily, flying forwards with his flippers glowing in preparation of a spell. The zombie quickly looked up and screamed again.

Marceline hung in the air, one arm extended in a throwing motion.

Gunter floated over Lemongrab's shoulder, his flippers glowing blue.

Even Marceline's axe hung motionlessly, a couple of feet from the zombie's head.

Slowly, Marceline heard the sound of Shoko's approaching footsteps. She tried to turn her head and shout a precaution to the other girl, but found she could do neither. She floated, helplessly petrified, as the sound got closer and closer, until she could tell Shoko stood in the doorway behind her.

"Hey, what's… Ah fudge, it's one of these guys!"

Marceline felt a swell of relief as she learnt that Shoko knew what they were dealing with, but her good feeling shattered as she saw Shoko charge through the corridor regardless. Shoko ducked Marceline, slalomed between Choose Goose and Lemongrab and vaulted over Marceline's axe. As she raised her dagger, to strike down on the monster, it looked up at her, and screamed a fourth and final time.

* * *

**For the Zelda fans among you, you'd better believe that thing's a Redead.**


	4. Chapter 4

Shoko's knife descended on the zombie's skull, undeterred by its paralyzing shriek. Once she slew the undead monster, she turned around, abandoning her knife, and caught Marceline's axe, as it continued on its course, then turned it sideways to deflect Gunter's spell, covering one of the walls with a thin layer of ice. Marceline, Choose Goose, Lemongrab and Gunter stumbled forwards as the paralysis wore off.

"How did you do that?" Marceline demanded.

"You weren't even rendered weak, by the monsters terrible shriek!" Choose Goose remarked, even more wide-eyed than usual.

Shoko threw Marceline's axe back to her, and pulled a small, metallic earplug out of her left ear, with a blinking, blue light on it. "I came prepared."

Lemongrab drew his sword and marched over to Shoko. "You kept that device for yourself!? YOU PRACTICALLY FED US TO IT!" He screamed, overlooking the fact that the zombie had displayed absolutely no interest in eating any of them.

"Well I couldn't exactly give it to you dude… You don't have any ears." Shoko pointed out.

Lemongrab opened his mouth, like he was about to scream a reply, but then frowned and rubbed the side of his head, self-consciously. Shoko retrieved her knife from the paralyzing zombie's head.

"You guys wanna go grab a crystal now?" She asked, prompting the other four to follow her towards the door the zombie had guarded and the castle's vault.

As the door swung open, the five of them stood, routed to the spot, scarcely believing their eyes. The vault was the size of a swimming pool, and was stuffed with every kind of treasure imaginable, in every colour of the rainbow. Mountains of gold reached up to the distant ceiling and breathtaking statues, made of solid diamonds loomed over the unlikely treasure hunters. Eventually, Gunter broke the stunned silence.

"WAAAAAA!" He cried excitedly.

Flailing his flippers like a windmill, Gunter charged forwards and dived into a small pile of rubies. He quacked in delight as he threw the tiny gems over his head, like a shower. Shoko quickly stepped forwards and lifted Gunter up by one of his flippers.

"Easy, penguin. Half of these gems have horrible curses on them. That's why we need to grab the Memory Crystal, instead of just stuffing our pockets." She said, answering the question Marceline was about to ask.

Marceline floated up into the air, gazing at the incredible riches, open-mouthed. Even she, who had absolutely no need for treasures, was awestruck.

"Hey Shoko!" She called. "What are we looking for?"

"My employer said the crystal would be in a bronze safe. That's all she could tell me."

The five of them split up, climbing, flying and digging their way through the towering mountains of gems. Choose Goose picked up a sapphire the size of a basketball and stared at it, longingly.

"I'd be set for a hundred years, with half the treasures stashed in here…"

Shoko sternly smacked the jewel out of his hands. "If stealing from this place was that easy, you wouldn't be able to move for all the thieves!"

Choose Goose sighed in despair and trudged back to his search for the safe.

"You're employer is maddeningly unhelpful!" Lemongrab growled at Shoko, with various necklaces and pendants covering his arms and neck.

"Yeah, well finding the thing is part of the job. If she had to tell me where it was, the contract wouldn't be worth as much." Shoko replied, as she nimbly hopped to the top of a pile of coins.

"Waaa waaa waaa!" Gunter's muffled quack came from deep within a mountain of sparkling jewels.

"Gunter…? You ok in there?" Marceline called, uncertainly.

She was just about to start digging him out, when the gems scatted like bullets as an explosion of snow and ice blasted the pile apart. Along with the gems, a frost covered safe sailed through the air and towards Marceline. As casually as if a paper aeroplane had been thrown at her, Marceline raised her left hand and caught the enormous, metal cube and set it down.

"Nice one, Gunter." Marceline smiled, as the little penguin, sent flying by the explosion he had caused, landed clumsily on top of the safe and bounced onto her head. Marceline pulled on the handle and wasn't surprised to find that it was locked. "Hang on guys, I got this." She said, dropping Gunter to the floor and raising her axe.

"Marceline! No!" Shoko cried, but she was too late.

Marceline's axe struck the safe with an ear splitting clang, accompanied by a flash of white light. The second it made contact, the axe spiralled out of Marceline's hands and shot across the room. Shoko swiftly stepped aside, dodging the axe by inches, leaving it to imbed itself into a wall, directly adjacent to Lemongrab's head.

"Oops…" Marceline muttered quietly.

Lemongrab's mouth hung open in speechless shock and a second later, he screamed as a small fountain of yellow liquid erupted from the top of his head.

"STEP MOMMY, WHY!?" He cried.

Marceline cringed. "Sorry dude… Hey, you wanna be a pal and not tell Bonnie about that?" She floated over to him to pry her axe from the wall, but let go of it as she realised it was covered in sticky lemon juice. "Ew…"

Shoko, Choose Goose and Gunter converged around the safe.

"Stand back you guys, I got this." Shoko said, getting down on her knees to inspect the keyhole.

She reached into her pocket and produced a lock pick she had designed herself, specifically for one-handed use. As she eased it towards the safe's keyhole, another flash of light sent it flying, just like Marceline's axe.

"Apple sauce!" She cursed. "It's got anti-lock picking barriers too…" She bit her bottom lip as she weighed out her options.

"For a very modest fee, I'll sell you a skeleton key!" Choose Goose offered.

"What? You got a key? Then use it!" She demanded.

"I'd love to tear this safe asunder, but to give away stock would be a terrible blunder!"

Shoko sighed and rummaged through a satchel attached to her tunic. "Fine, I'll give you twenty gold coins for it. But I'm keeping it! And if it doesn't work, I want a refund!"

"Well I declare, that does seem fair!" Choose Goose reached into his bag and started rummaging around.

"Hey… whoa, what? Dozed off for a second there, what did I miss?" Keith said.

Your bag talks?" Shoko was remarkably unphased.

"The goose picked up an ENEMY HITCHHIKER!" Lemongrab loudly criticised.

"I know you don't want to be friends mate, but you could at least meet me half-way and consider me an anti-hero…" Keith suggested. "By the way CG, if you're looking for this key thing, it's jabbing me in the forehead. Down a bit, to the left, no, that's my nose, up a bit. You got it! You got it!"

Choose Goose produced a large, rusty, utterly unremarkable key. Shoko counted twenty gold coins from her satchel and handed them to the goose.

"For another gold coins three, I'll give a twelve month guarantee!" Choose Goose held up the key, temptingly.

Shoko snatched it from him, angrily. "I told you, if this doesn't work, I'm _taking_ my money back!" She threatened.

As Marceline and Lemongrab made their way over to the safe, they all watched attentively as Shoko slowly eased the key towards the safe's keyhole… It went in without incident. Shoko twisted and there was the dull sound of metal scraping against metal as the lock slid open. They all held their breath as Shoko reached into the safe and, a moment later, smiling warmly, she turned back around, with a large, silver crystal.

The crystal itself was the size of a fist and it was set into a wooden frame with a thick handle. The frame left half of the crystal exposed, likely so it could be used on unwilling victims. All together, the thing looked like the end of a golf club.

"Stand back everyone." Shoko warned. "You only have to touch this thing and you can lose months, or even years of your memory."

Everyone instinctively took a few steps back as Shoko carefully opened her satchel and dropped the crystal inside.

"Let's get going. Undead peeps aren't gonna give this up without a fight." Shoko said, quickly.

Without waiting for the others to respond, Shoko darted across the piles of treasure and out of the vault. As the others ran after the one-armed thief, they realised she hadn't been wrong. She was already fending off four undead soldiers as they caught up with her in the corridor. Marceline swept past Shoko and decisively ended the fight with a swing of her axe. The five of them struggled onwards as more and more undead warriors came running down the halls, in defence of the castle's treasure. Marceline and Shoko fought as quickly as they could, while Gunter filled the corridor behind them with impassable walls of ice to stop them getting surrounded, but they were slowing to a stop as the wave of undead got thicker and thicker until they were practically piling up on top of one another in a desperate bid to dismember the five thieves. Marceline's axe and Shoko's sword were hazy blurs as they sparred with the countless weapons being flailed in their direction.

"This isn't working!" Marceline pointed out, shouting over the chaos. "Gunter! Buy us a little time?"

Gunter quacked several times and a wall of solid ice crept up from the ground, just a couple of inches in front of the girls. As it reached up, it surrounded several of the soldiers, freezing them solid, instantly, until they were left with a solid wall, with icy statues eerily reaching towards them with rotting claws and weapons. A similar sight was behind them, as Gunter had frozen the undead soldiers that had approached from the other direction.

The five of them stood, back to back in their tiny, bare cubicle of ice. From both sides, came the dull sound of weapons, striking the ice in an attempt to break through. Even Marceline was rattled by the dancing shadows of hundreds of skeletal claws on the gleaming blue walls of ice, and the angry chatter of those who wanted to tear them limb from limb.

"Give back the crystal and be smart!" Choose Goose desperately snapped at Shoko. "They're going to tear us all apart!"

"I will not die for your SHINY TRINKET!" Lemongrab howled, also rounding on Shoko.

"I know I can't really be subjective, as I technically still work for them." Keith mumbled. "But yeah, giving back the crystal would probably be a good idea."

"No way guys. We worked hard for this thing, and I _don't_ give stuff back! You have any idea how unprofessional that is?" Shoko protested.

Suddenly, a chunk of ice broke off the wall behind Shoko and a skeletal hand reached through and grasped a handful of her hair.

"Ow! Ow! Get this off me!" Shoko flailed her sword behind her, but was unable to reach the arm.

Marceline was just about to fly to Shoko's aide, when Lemongrab surprised them all by beating her to it.

"WITHDRAW, UNDEAD FIEND!" Without even giving the owner of the arm a chance to heed his warning, Lemongrab swung his sword into the air and cleaved right through the bone.

Several more arms reached through the hole. The ice around it began to fracture. Marceline's eyes darted to the stone ceiling above them, it didn't look _that_ heavy, not heavy enough to kill someone if they were hit by a chunk of it, anyway.

"Up?" She suggested to Shoko.

"Up." Shoko immediately agreed.

Marceline focused her transformation on her hands, making them enormous, hairy and clawed, and started to tear away chunks of the ceiling.

"HURRY STEP MOMMY!" Lemongrab cried, as more of the ice walls began to crumble.

Gritting her teeth, Marceline forcefully punched a hole in the ceiling, then grabbed Lemongrab by his collar and forced him through it, then gave Choose Goose a leg up. Gunter floated up to the upper floor and Shoko jumped after him, needing equally little assistance. As Marceline scrambled through the hole, Gunter's walls collapsed with a shower of sleet, and the army of undead tore towards her, clawing at her boots as she pulled her feet up.

The floor they had climbed into was identical to the previous one, it was another bare, stone corridor, with labyrinthine corridors reaching out in all directions.

"Keep going." Shoko ordered Marceline. "Our best bet right now if escaping from the roof."

Although she didn't generally like being told what to do, Marceline let it slide, since she agreed with Shoko, and it was hardly the time for a petty quarrel. Now that she had room to move, Marceline took a few steps away from the others, transformed fully into her giant bat form, and tunnelled upwards relentlessly. Three floors later, she emerged on one of the castle's many battlements. A second later, Shoko climbed up after her and Gunter followed, desperately flapping his flippers as he struggled to fly with Choose Goose and Lemongrab hanging off his feet. Marceline would have laughed, if it wasn't for the sight that had greeted her as she had emerged from the castle.

The Graveyard Kingdom's castle had been surrounded from every possible angle. The sky was filled with every manner of dragon, wyvern and winged demon. They were so numerous that they blotted out the stars. On the ground, was an army of zombies that stretched as far as the eye could see.

"Yikes…" Marceline breathed. "These guys _really_ don't like getting stolen from."


	5. Chapter 5

"So Gunter, think you can wrap this up?" Marceline smiled.

Throughout her life, Marceline had never been given any reason to believe that the magic of Simon's crown had limits. It had shielded Simon from a world-destroying nuclear blast and had created the Ice Kingdom, which was far bigger than the Graveyard Kingdom. Now that they had room to move in, Marceline wasn't remotely fazed by the colossal army bearing down on them.

"Waaa!" Gunter quacked with confidence.

He started to lift into the air and snow circled around his flippers in preparation, when suddenly, Choose Goose surprised them all by snatching the crown off Gunter's head, leaving him to plop back to the ground.

"Your arrogance, it makes me frown! Why _I _could wear a silly crown!"

Before anyone could stop him, Choose Goose lifted the crown up and placed it on his head.

The effect was instantaneous.

Choose Goose launched into the air with such force, that the stone floor beneath them cracked, he left a trail of snowflakes and rotting, yellow feathers. He began to laugh, maniacally and his pupils vanished, leaving milky, white pools where his eyes once were.

"AAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAAHAAA! COME ON KIDDIES WATCH THE SHOW, AS I COAT THE WORLD IN ICE AND SNOW!"

Marceline couldn't believe her eyes. If this was the affect the crown had on everyone, then what the Glob was it about Gunter that protected his sanity?

The aerial undead began to descend on Choose Goose, but suddenly, a tornado of ice exploded out of the ground, surrounding Marceline, Shoko, Lemongrab and Gunter, tearing most of the castle around them to shreds as it went. It reached into the air and blew around Choose Goose, tearing the demons and wyverns out of the sky like flies.

All Marceline could see was the whirling white around her. Choose Goose's maniacal laughter was uncomfortably familiar to her. Besides her, Lemongrab was huddled to the floor, clutching Gunter for comfort. The penguin was looking up at the new wearer of Simon's crown and quacked desperately. Marceline didn't need to speak Penguin to realise that Gunter was desperate to get it back, like a teenager who had lost his parents' car.

Marceline struggled to her feet, along with Shoko.

"THINK YOU CAN GET US UP THERE!?" Shoko bellowed over the noise.

"LET'S FIND OUT!" Marceline shouted back.

Marceline crouched down, letting the one-armed girl climb onto her back and wrap her arm around her neck, and then shakily lifted off. The howling winds constantly threatening to drag Marceline into an icy oblivion, but she struggled onwards, climbing up through the centre of the tornado and towards the insane goose. Her joints began to freeze and frost coated her skin and hair. She could only imagine how Shoko felt, as she was the only one of the two of them who actually needed body heat.

As Marceline reached Choose Goose's level, she needed all of concentration, just to keep herself from being blown away. Luckily, Shoko was there to do the talking.

"Choose Goose! You can stop now!" She shouted.

"I WON'T BE A PERFECT WIZARD, 'TILL I'VE COVERED OOO IN AN ETERNAL BLIZZARD!" He laughed.

Keith shouted something in distress, but he was barely audible over the roaring winds. Shoko wrapped her legs around Marceline's torso and reached for the crown with numb, immobile fingers. Marceline tried to get them closer, but it was no use, the icy winds cloaked Choose Goose like a shield. Shoko leant down and tightly wrapped her arm around Marceline's neck again.

"Marceline! Relax and let the tornado blow us away! I've got an idea!" She shouted.

Not crazy about the idea, but lacking one of her own, Marceline sighed and did as Shoko said. The wind swept her up instantly and threw her into the air. As the girls hit the outside of the tornado, they were frozen instantly. Their stomachs lurched as they plummeted helplessly from the sky, encased in a thin, but sturdy layer of ice. As the ground hurtled towards them, the ice began to crack, and then shattered as Marceline grew into her bat form, flying upside-down, as she had been when the ice broke. Shoko slipped and just managed to grab a handful of fur, after Marceline's neck got too thick for Shoko to wrap her arm round. Marceline rolled the right way up, spread her battered wings and took to the sky, with Shoko sitting comfortably on her back.

Once they had avoided a gravity-induced death, the two girls gaped at the sight before them. The castle had been torn to shreds and the entire kingdom was covered in a thick layer of snow that almost put the Ice Kingdom itself to shame. The mighty dragons that had loomed over them were now colossal ice statues, collapsed on the ground and in some cases, smashed to pieces by the fall. The legions of the undead stood, surrounding the tornado, rows upon rows of them, turned to ice. Some of them standing their ground, like true soldiers, while others were frozen in a running, or scrambling on their back pose. The tornado swirling over the wreckage of the castle raged on. Blue lightning boomed from it threateningly and layer upon layer of snow emerged from the bottom, like ripples on a pond.

"Marceline, fly as high as you can, and get us above the vortex!" Shoko shouted.

Marceline almost laughed. Clearly Shoko underestimated her. Marceline had once flown to space, just to see if she could, and the only things that limited her stay there were boredom and a complete lack of red things in space.

Wisely deciding not to stop and explain that to Shoko, Marceline soared into the air, and took them to a safe distance above Choose Goose's tornado. The ground was distant and even the ice-covered dragons looked like miniscule ants. A girl less brave than Shoko would have clutched handfuls of Marceline's fur and never let go. Marceline wasn't sure what the plan was, if they flew down through the funnel, they'd just get blown away again before they reached the maniacal goose.

"So what now?" She snarled through her monstrous fangs.

"Firstly, you need to change back to your human form!"

"I'm a stronger flier like this!" Marceline protested. She hadn't changed earlier, for fear of freezing her wings.

"Just trust me!"

Even though they had only met a few hours ago, Marceline did trust Shoko, so she reluctantly shrank, leaving Shoko to sit on her back again. But with some difficulty, Shoko prompted the vampire into a standing position, and climbed around her so she was standing on Marceline's feet, with her hand on her shoulder.

"What does this have to do with…?" Marceline started.

Shoko interrupted Marceline, and almost shocked her into falling out of the sky, by pressing her lips against hers. Marceline flailed her arms desperately and pushed Shoko off her, while holding her shoulders so she didn't fall.

"Wha… You… Bu…" Marceline babbled.

Shoko smiled and giggled slightly. "Thanks Vampire Queen, it's been fun."

And with that, Shoko pushed against Marceline and began to descend. She rolled in the air, pinned her arm to her side and plummeted straight down towards the tornado, her hair billowing behind her like a majestic cape. She gently twisted her arm and legs, guiding herself directly to the centre of the vortex. It wasn't the first time Shoko had dived from a staggering height for only partially logical reasons.

The wind was blinding, it felt like it was going to tear Shoko's face off. She squinted desperately as she shot into the tornado and through the tunnel of swirling white, focusing on the upcoming spec of yellow.

In an eye-watering cross between a vertical rugby tackle and a punch in the stomach, with a touch of apocalyptic asteroid strike, Shoko and Choose Goose collided. The crown went flying from Choose Goose's head and, as the tornado began to thin, the two of them slowly began to fall.

Truthfully, Shoko hadn't planned on this being a suicide mission. If anything, she had only chosen the reckless solution for an excuse to kiss Marceline. As for surviving? Shoko had learnt to trust her gut over the years, and on the rare occasion that she worked with people even close to her level of competence, that meant trusting her team.

Sure enough, the next second, Marceline tore through the gentle blanket of snow in her bat form, like some terrible shark, and snatched Shoko out of the air. Marceline had known that she could never fly as fast as Shoko fell, but, assuming she succeeded in separating Choose Goose from the crown, she could catch up with her as the whirlwind slowed Shoko down.

Marceline reverted form, still holding Shoko by her hand as she lowered her to the ground, then took her by surprise by forcefully smacking the side of her head.

"You nimrod! That was a pretty dumb gesture to make up for stealing a kiss!" She hissed angrily.

Before Shoko could reply, they were both distracted as Lemongrab mumbled wearily as he staggered to his feet. He pointed a finger at Shoko and opened his mouth, but was immediately interrupted by Choose Goose, as he fell on the furious lemon man, with a splash of snow and yellow liquid.

"Choose Goose you TREACHEROUS BIRD!" A slightly squashed, but otherwise unharmed Lemongrab wailed. Standing up, he pulled Choose Goose to his feet and shook him by the front of his shirt as he screamed at him. "I'LL SEE YOU ROT IN THE DUNGEONS FOR A MILLION YEARS!"

"UNHAND ME YOU SILLY MAN! THE AGE OF ICE AND SNOW'S AT HAND!" Choose Goose screamed back.

As well as his soulless, white eyes, patches of Choose Goose's feathers had fallen off, making him look like an insane zombie. Unlike in Simon's early days, removing the crown had done nothing but strip Choose Goose of the crown's powers.

Shoko nervously lifted the crown out of the rubble and snow, unsure of what to do with it. Gunter waddled over to Shoko and reached up for the crown with his flippers. Choose Goose spun around to face Shoko, rage boiling in his cold, dead eyes.

"You harmed the crown in your attack, it made me mad so GIVE IT BACK!"

Choose Goose charged at Shoko and she quickly threw the crown to Marceline. As soon as Choose Goose looked away from Shoko, she reached into her satchel, pulled out the crystal and lightly tapped it against the side of Choose Goose's head. The crystal glowed brightly for a split second, and as soon as Shoko pulled it back, Choose Goose swooned and collapsed to the ground. Slowly, his eyes clouded and returned to normal, then his feathers grew back.

"What did you do?" Marceline asked, daring to hope that the same thing might be repeated for someone else.

"I erased his memory of being controlled by the crown. I wasn't sure if that'd break the connection or not, but I guess we got lucky."

"How much memory can that thing erase!?" Marceline demanded, quickly.

"As much as you want. I think it takes about ten years per second it touches the skin. If we're lucky, our friend here didn't lose more than a few months." As Shoko realised Marceline was staring at her, she realised what Marceline must be getting at. "Oh, you want to use it on someone else? Well I wouldn't do that if I were you, unless they put it on recently, like, the last few years."

Marceline felt the shining hope in her chest fracture in preparation for Shoko's bombshell. "Why not?" She snapped.

"Well if you overshoot, and take all a guy's memories, they'll turn into a vegetable."

Marceline's heart sank. "It'll jank up his brain?"

"What? No, it literally turns people into vegetables. It's like a weird side-effect or something…"

Choose Goose's low groan distracted the two of them again. "I swear I went to sleep in my bed…" He remarked, confused by his surroundings. Then winced and rubbed his forehead. "What the Grod happened to my head!?"

Before anyone else could explain, Keith called through Choose Goose's bag, still secured to his back. "Leave this to me, you guys, he needs a BFF to explain this to him."

"I must have been asleep for weeks! Suddenly, my bag, it speaks!"

Turning away as Choose Goose chatted with the head in his bag, Shoko whispered, "Well, if he doesn't remember any of it, I'd say that's his cut forfeit."

"Seems fair." Marceline shrugged.

"I guess I'll go sell this thing then." Shoko said, returning the crystal to her satchel. "You coming?"

Marceline yawned. "Nah, you can keep my cut, I'm going to bed. You want a ride, sweetie?"

Gunter quacked happily and, with the crown back on his head, floated onto Marceline's shoulders. Lemongrab shuffled over to them, angrily.

"I will be expecting my full share of the bounty!" He cried, and then thrust his forearm in Shoko's face. "There is also a tear on my shirt and I demand COMPENSATION!"

Shoko winced at Lemongrab's scream. "Relax lemon, we'll split the whole reward. 5,000 little emeralds each. Sound good?"

Lemongrab frowned but nodded, reluctant to admit he was pleased with something.

"Well, later dudes." Marceline said.

She began to float into the air, but Shoko quickly stepped forwards and held her arm, stopping her. She smiled nervously.

"Hey Marceline… Do you…?"

"I'm seeing someone, dude." Marceline interrupted.

"What?" Shoko blushed a slightly deeper shade of green.

"Yeah… it's pretty serious… But if you want to hang out on another job some time, deffs look me up. This was a riot."

Shoko smiled gratefully. "You bet."

Marceline and Gunter took to the sky. "See you guys!"

"Bye Marceline!" Shoko called.

"You were acceptable company!" Lemongrab shrieked.

* * *

**For those of you who don't know, November is National Novel Writing Month, which means my story update rate will suffer or (far more likely) stop all together. See you all in December!**


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